Wearing Too Much Perfume or Cologne to Work?
Wearing too much perfume, cologne, or other scented products will make people scatter or wish they could. Unfortunately, rather than tell you that you’re wearing too much, people will just avoid sitting near you. Scent is such a personal thing, like clothing choices, that people are hesitant to comment on it.
I suggest not wearing anything scented at work, on airplanes, or when you’ll be in close proximity with other people you don’t know well. But if I can’t persuade you to skip the scent, here are a few guidelines when putting on cologne and perfume:
• Spray the air ten inches in front of you, and walk through the mist, rather than spraying your skin.
• If you can smell the scent on yourself or people who are more than a few inches from you can smell it, you’re wearing too much.
• You should never be able to smell a person’s cologne after they’ve left a room.
No, I’m not an expert on how to wear perfume. I googled it. I’m an expert at how to talk about how scents impact you and your work environment.
The next step is to ask a few people you trust to tell you when you wear too much perfume or cologne. Give people permission to give you this feedback and promise you won’t bite their head off when they do. This could sound something like, “I want to be sure I’m not wearing too much perfume/cologne. Would you be willing to tell me when I do? I promise I won’t freak out or jump down your throat. I really want to know.”
Let’s say you work with someone who wears too much perfume, cologne or other scented products. They haven’t asked if they’re wearing too much, and you want to say something. You could say something like, “This is a bit awkward, but the perfume/cologne you wear is a bit overwhelming. Would you be willing to wear less or none when you’re in the office?” This is an awkward conversation that most people don’t want to have. Consider that you’re doing the person a favor. Would you rather know the amount of scent you wear keeps other people away, or would you rather alienate the people around you?
If the relationship is a personal one, you could say, “You wear the most lovely cologne/perfume. I’m very sensitive to scents. Would you be willing not to wear perfume/cologne when we’re together?” Again, this is an awkward conversation. But you won’t die from having it and the other person won’t either. When they get over being embarrassed and defensive, your relationship will be fine. And if it’s not, you didn’t have much of a relationship to begin with.
Tags: creating a candid culture, giving feedback, giving negative feedback at work, having awkward conversations, having difficult conversations, how to tell someone they wear too much cologne, how to tell someone they wear too much perfume
Since I had COVID in 2022, I have an a chronic cough. Scents are also now more of a trigger for coughing fits. People will sit down next to me on the plane and be upset that I am coughing even though it is their taking a bath in their cologne that triggers the fit. It is so hard to say to someone that is asking the flight attendant to reseat them because of my cough that they are the problem in the first place. People overuse scent and need to be aware especially if they will be in enclosed or small spaces.
Of course you’ll get this follow-up question because conversely, I need suggestions to speak to someone who smells pungently bad. It might be shoes and foot fungus or it might just be b.o. which is even harder for me to address. suggestions?
Thank you